Yeah, I know, World War III, serious business. I just can't get into the mood tonight to tell everybody that they're under threat of being drafted after we go to war with Iran, Russia, and possibly China. What I am in the mood for though is some weird science and philosophy discussion. I've actually wanted to write about this for a while now, so I'm a bit excited. Forgive me if this post goes on a while.
First, let me explain the experiment:
If you want to listen to a great episode of WNYC's Radio Lab that discusses this experiment, go here: http://www.wnyc.org/stream/ram.py?file=/radiolab/radiolab030405.ra
It starts at about 38:30
The experiment was on finger-wiggling. If you've heard of the experiment you've probably already thought through a lot of what I am going to say, but bear with me as I detail it for those who have not heard of it. Starting in the 1960's, several times this experiment has been repeated. Scientists decided to take a look at decision making and free will. They hooked people up to a machine that measured their brain waves and then asked them to wiggle their finger. Of course the machines that read their brain waves found a peak of activity correlating to the brain telling the finger to wiggle, and a second peak making the finger wiggle. It would make sense that the procession of events would be: You decide to wiggle your finger, then the peak occurs telling your finger to wiggle, then your finger wiggles. However, what they found was that the order really went: A peak occurs telling your finger to wiggle, then you get the sensation of deciding to wiggle your finger, then your finger wiggles. That's right, the activity in your brain that tells your finger it is going to wiggle occurs not just before your finger wiggles, it occurs before you decide to wiggle your finger! At least, it occurs before you are consciously aware that you've decided to wiggle your finger. Philosophers had a field day with this study, and it seemed everyone had their own conclusions to make of it. Of course I can't get into all of their different theories and suppositions, but I will tell you the questions that this experiment poses, though they're not questions posed only by this experiment, and then I'll tell you how I think things go.
First of all, the immediate question that comes to mind is: Does this experiment disprove feel will? If this machine can tell what you are about to do before you are even aware that you are about to do it, then isn't it logical to conclude that your actions are not the result of your consciousness, but of activities within your brain that you have no awareness of? Maybe your consciousness is but one part of the myriad that composes your brain, and clearly not the decision-maker of the bunch. You can still have free will, but it resides in a part of your brain that is different from the feeling you have about what is you, namely your conscious thought, your inner monologue. Still, if that is the case then how does that change the issue? If it's a part of your brain other than your consciousness that is calling the shots, that doesn't solve the mystery of whether or not it's actions are pre-ordained. In fact, it makes the question harder to answer, because it puts the decision making in a part of the brain in which we have just by definition close off to our conscious, the answer-seeking portion of our minds. Maybe then our consciousness exists only to explain the events occurring within ourselves. Human beings evolved to the point where we are now mostly based on our ability to reason, to link cause and effect. It only makes sense that there should evolve a part of our brain that serves to find reason behind the actions of others, and after time, the actions of ourselves. It serves us well to know why other people do what they do, and as we developed more and more self-awareness, we came to apply those same principles to ourselves. However it wasn't the same as when we applied them to other people. We weren't trying to figure out what their motivations were, we knew our own motivations already. So rather than perceiving our actions as the natural reactions to our motivations, we perceived them as decisions that we made to satisfy our motivations. Our motivations and desires were things that we chose to satiate rather than the drive behind our actions. Think about it for a second, when a dog acts do you think that it has an inner monologue that justifies each action, that believes that it has planned each action out beforehand? We can't know exactly what goes on in the minds of other species, but it seems that they simply act rather than thinking about it beforehand. This doesn't mean that they are unable to plan ahead, just that this planning ahead occurs without the need for an active conscious. In fact, the absence of that internal monologue in animals that are capable of planning ahead may be evidence that it may not be the part of our brains that actually does the planning and decision making.
So which of these do I believe? Well, I just so happen to believe in the last one. Mainly because it's the one that I came up with. It's not that I'm the only one to have come up with it, I'm probably somewhere in the low twenty millions to have thought that since the experiment was done. However it's where I arrived after thinking about it on my own. Now what do I think that this means? Well, when I was younger I happened to think a lot about free will. To me the world seemed able to be broken down to cause and effect in any situation. Leaves moved because wind blew them, people ate because they felt hungry, chemical reactions proceeded because of the immutable laws of thermodynamics. I was certain that everything could be broken down into cause and effect on simple, even microscopic levels. After all, our brains are composed of cells, composed of compounds, composed of atoms that all behave the way they do based on the actions of the other atoms surrounding them. The extrapolation of this was that something as complex as someone deciding to and going for a walk could be explained by the set of atoms that comprised them following the natural cause and effect pathways that were effected on them. It's kind of like if you had a handful of marbles and dropped them, you could, given enough computational power, calculate exactly where each marble would land. I realize the analogy is thin (and I'm not a fan of analogies to begin with), but I hope it helps clarify my point. However, when you get down to subatomic levels, things stop becoming that simple. I've already rambled on quite a bit, so I won't get into quantum mechanics. One, because it's a subject that I know embarrassingly little about, and two, because it's incredibly complex and confusing, and there are few people that know the subject well enough to talk about it without being embarrassed at how little they understand it. Still, when you get to a quantum level, nothing exists in a set state. The quantum world is a world of possibilities. When you measure the path an electron takes between two points, you find that it doesn't actually chose a path UNTIL you try and measure it. Before that it exists as any possibility. (This is very cartoony, but explains pretty simply what I'm talking about: http://youtube.com/watch?v=DfPeprQ7oGc) To me, this is where free-will lies. We have the ability to chose, to shape our own realities. In summation, just what the hell is it that I'm talking about?
Well, I do think that our consciousnesses evolved to make sense of the actions of other monkeys. And I do think that our sense of self, and our sense of active decision making came about as a result of our consciousnesses trying to make sense of the interplay of our own actions and motivations and becoming intensely confused. I believe that confusion manifests as our sense of self. But as I said, I do think that free will does exist. Our actions may not always be decided by our conscious selves, but our actions are guided by who we are. And who we are is a creation of our consciousness.
The interesting thing about this is: What I believe may be true for me, but it may also be true only for me. If our consciousness serves the purpose of making sense the events that precede it and compose it, then it makes sense that each person has the ability to construct their own reality, and that each persons reality is just as valid as the next. Of course, I don't believe that for a second. I'd love to hear what people think about this, and feel free to tell me that I'm full of shit. I quite expect that I am.
Tuesday, October 23, 2007
Sunday, October 21, 2007
WWIII part II - Turkish incursions
http://seattletimes.nwsource.com/html/nationworld/2003958267_turkey18.html - The vote from a few days ago allowing Turkey to pursue Kurdish rebels into Iraq
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/21399932/ - And things instantly get even worse
http://abclocal.go.com/kgo/story?section=politics&id=5701106 - And also, this is happening.
Ok, so Turkey has been a pretty important US ally in recent history. Their support was pretty huge in the first Gulf War, and they were initially very supportive of what used to be called "Operation Iraqi Freedom". Or maybe it was "Operation Enduring Freedom". I don't remember what they called it then, I don't know what they call it now, but it doesn't make a difference. The point is Turkish support is a huge lynch pin to our strategic capabilities in the middle east. As such we have always rewarded the Turkish government generously, to the tune of several billion dollars.
The Iraq war changed everything though. The war brought our interests into conflict with Turkish interests regarding the ethnic minority in the north of Iraq, the Kurds. Kurdistan, the semi-independent in the north of Iraq, has been the most peaceful area of Iraq throughout the US occupation. The Kurds have worked with the US to fight insurgents and Al Qaeda, and Kurdistan is a pretty well functioning "country" of it's own. The only problem is that they fucking hate the Turkish. The Kurds aren't contained only to the north of Iraq, they are also a minority in parts of Turkey. The conflict between the Kurds and Turkey has been going on for a long, long time, and has a Northern Ireland feel to it, to put it in a context of something you're probably more familiar with. The largest group working against the Turkish government, the PKK, is worth reading up on: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/PKK
We've put ourselves into a situation where we are beholden to both sides of a conflict that predates our interests in the area, and which until recently had nothing to do with us. Man, that's a familiar feeling isn't it? And of course, rather than handle the situation delicately our congress is working on a resolution which would condemn the treatment of Armenians in Turkey during the first world war as genocide. Here's two obvious points: Yes, it was genocide. Secondly, how is this relevant enough to merit doing this now?
To sum up, we're in a position now where two important allies are basically in a war which has done nothing but escalate recently. Our efforts to soothe the conflict have so far been in vain, but how much diplomatic success can you really expect from this administration? If we lose Turkey, we lose a powerful ally in the middle east whose help could be invaluable if a larger conflict does break out. If we lose the Kurds, we lose our most successful area of Iraq, leading to a further destabilization that is probably beyond any hope. Of course, you could argue that it's already at that point, but I digress. I wish I could say that if we pulled out of Iraq we would be enough removed from this conflict that we wouldn't have to worry about it. In truth, the best we can do is pull out and hope that we can resolve the situation diplomatically. This specific conflict isn't something that is going to be affected much by our actions, but the results of how we handle this still has wide-ranging implications on the stability of the middle east, and the safety of our armed forces stationed there.
Ok, this post was late, but hopefully tomorrow will see part III, which will deal with deteriorating US relations with Russia, and what it means for our presence in the middle east. As always, stay informed!
EDIT - http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/21417605/ - thank God, it seems that for now, this might be avoided. I sincerely hope so.
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/21399932/ - And things instantly get even worse
http://abclocal.go.com/kgo/story?section=politics&id=5701106 - And also, this is happening.
Ok, so Turkey has been a pretty important US ally in recent history. Their support was pretty huge in the first Gulf War, and they were initially very supportive of what used to be called "Operation Iraqi Freedom". Or maybe it was "Operation Enduring Freedom". I don't remember what they called it then, I don't know what they call it now, but it doesn't make a difference. The point is Turkish support is a huge lynch pin to our strategic capabilities in the middle east. As such we have always rewarded the Turkish government generously, to the tune of several billion dollars.
The Iraq war changed everything though. The war brought our interests into conflict with Turkish interests regarding the ethnic minority in the north of Iraq, the Kurds. Kurdistan, the semi-independent in the north of Iraq, has been the most peaceful area of Iraq throughout the US occupation. The Kurds have worked with the US to fight insurgents and Al Qaeda, and Kurdistan is a pretty well functioning "country" of it's own. The only problem is that they fucking hate the Turkish. The Kurds aren't contained only to the north of Iraq, they are also a minority in parts of Turkey. The conflict between the Kurds and Turkey has been going on for a long, long time, and has a Northern Ireland feel to it, to put it in a context of something you're probably more familiar with. The largest group working against the Turkish government, the PKK, is worth reading up on: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/PKK
We've put ourselves into a situation where we are beholden to both sides of a conflict that predates our interests in the area, and which until recently had nothing to do with us. Man, that's a familiar feeling isn't it? And of course, rather than handle the situation delicately our congress is working on a resolution which would condemn the treatment of Armenians in Turkey during the first world war as genocide. Here's two obvious points: Yes, it was genocide. Secondly, how is this relevant enough to merit doing this now?
To sum up, we're in a position now where two important allies are basically in a war which has done nothing but escalate recently. Our efforts to soothe the conflict have so far been in vain, but how much diplomatic success can you really expect from this administration? If we lose Turkey, we lose a powerful ally in the middle east whose help could be invaluable if a larger conflict does break out. If we lose the Kurds, we lose our most successful area of Iraq, leading to a further destabilization that is probably beyond any hope. Of course, you could argue that it's already at that point, but I digress. I wish I could say that if we pulled out of Iraq we would be enough removed from this conflict that we wouldn't have to worry about it. In truth, the best we can do is pull out and hope that we can resolve the situation diplomatically. This specific conflict isn't something that is going to be affected much by our actions, but the results of how we handle this still has wide-ranging implications on the stability of the middle east, and the safety of our armed forces stationed there.
Ok, this post was late, but hopefully tomorrow will see part III, which will deal with deteriorating US relations with Russia, and what it means for our presence in the middle east. As always, stay informed!
EDIT - http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/21417605/ - thank God, it seems that for now, this might be avoided. I sincerely hope so.
Friday, October 19, 2007
How to avoid world war III
"But this — we got a leader in Iran who has announced that he wants to destroy Israel. So I’ve told people that if you’re interested in avoiding World War III, it seems like you ought to be interested in preventing them from have the knowledge necessary to make a nuclear weapon…" - G.W.Bush - 10/17/07
“I think the rapid growth in Russian military spending definitely bears watching,” Rice said. “And frankly, some of the efforts - for instance, Bear flights in areas that we haven’t seen for a while - are really not helpful to security.” - Condolezza Rice - 10/16/07
http://www.iht.com/articles/2007/10/18/europe/18turkey.php - Turkish parliament approves incursion into Iraq to deal with attacks from the PKK
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/pages/live/articles/news/worldnews.html?in_article_id=464921&in_page_id=1811
- Russia lays claim to vast oil fields in the arctic near the north pole.
http://www.tehrantimes.com/index_View.asp?code=154905 - Putin visits Iran
OK, so there are several threats here that need to be evaluated, and I'm gonna break them down into three separate conflicts: U.S. vs. Iran, U.S. vs. Russia, and U.S. vs. Turkey. Then we'll be able to see what is the central issue joining each conflict. (hint: it's oil!)
U.S. vs Iran
If you're not aware of the push to war with Iran from the Bush administration, then you've been living under a rock for at least a year. Do yourself a favor and watch the news tonight, I guarantee there will be a story on it. In short, Iran claims it wants to develop nuclear energy, but the U.S. asserts it is trying to develop nuclear weapons. The U.S. claims Iran is directly funding terrorist attacks on our soldiers in Iraq, and while Iran doesn't directly deny this, the truth is more money comes into Iraq to support Sunni terrorists from Saudi Arabia, a staunch "ally" of the U.S, than comes into Iraq from Iran to support the Shiites. Iran was involved in the detainment of British sailors, while the U.S. has on several occasions rounded up Iranian "diplomats" in Iraq. Both sides of course are wrong, neither side is being at all honest or forthcoming, both sides are doing things that are both illegal and immoral, but that's just international relations for you. The danger with Iran though is that things will escalate further for a JUSTIFIED REASON. The fact is, the longer we are in Iraq, the more likely it is that eventually something drastic will happen between the two countries. Two nations can only push each other for so long before one crosses the line and provokes a full out war. It could be the U.S. deciding to strategically bomb Iran's "nuclear sites", it could be as simple as Iranian border guards with itchy trigger fingers killing U.S. troops. The danger with the U.S. being in such a tense situation with Iran while in Iraq is that a situation may arise where we SHOULD go to war with Iran. At least that is how it will be presented to us when American soldiers end up dead by Iranian hands. I don't know if I'll be able to disagree with them. And it will be a damned shame too, because the populous of Iran is surprisingly pro-American. Most young Iranians crave better relations with the west, and don't like the old, islamist leaders of their nation who keep their country from advancing economically and technologically through their constant saber rattling. Of course, the quickest way we could possibly galvanize support for the failing leadership in Iran would be to go to war with them.
Ok, break for today, tomorrow I'll post U.S. vs Turkey, then on sunday U.S. vs Russia, and finally on Monday the conclusion.
“I think the rapid growth in Russian military spending definitely bears watching,” Rice said. “And frankly, some of the efforts - for instance, Bear flights in areas that we haven’t seen for a while - are really not helpful to security.” - Condolezza Rice - 10/16/07
http://www.iht.com/articles/2007/10/18/europe/18turkey.php - Turkish parliament approves incursion into Iraq to deal with attacks from the PKK
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/pages/live/articles/news/worldnews.html?in_article_id=464921&in_page_id=1811
- Russia lays claim to vast oil fields in the arctic near the north pole.
http://www.tehrantimes.com/index_View.asp?code=154905 - Putin visits Iran
OK, so there are several threats here that need to be evaluated, and I'm gonna break them down into three separate conflicts: U.S. vs. Iran, U.S. vs. Russia, and U.S. vs. Turkey. Then we'll be able to see what is the central issue joining each conflict. (hint: it's oil!)
U.S. vs Iran
If you're not aware of the push to war with Iran from the Bush administration, then you've been living under a rock for at least a year. Do yourself a favor and watch the news tonight, I guarantee there will be a story on it. In short, Iran claims it wants to develop nuclear energy, but the U.S. asserts it is trying to develop nuclear weapons. The U.S. claims Iran is directly funding terrorist attacks on our soldiers in Iraq, and while Iran doesn't directly deny this, the truth is more money comes into Iraq to support Sunni terrorists from Saudi Arabia, a staunch "ally" of the U.S, than comes into Iraq from Iran to support the Shiites. Iran was involved in the detainment of British sailors, while the U.S. has on several occasions rounded up Iranian "diplomats" in Iraq. Both sides of course are wrong, neither side is being at all honest or forthcoming, both sides are doing things that are both illegal and immoral, but that's just international relations for you. The danger with Iran though is that things will escalate further for a JUSTIFIED REASON. The fact is, the longer we are in Iraq, the more likely it is that eventually something drastic will happen between the two countries. Two nations can only push each other for so long before one crosses the line and provokes a full out war. It could be the U.S. deciding to strategically bomb Iran's "nuclear sites", it could be as simple as Iranian border guards with itchy trigger fingers killing U.S. troops. The danger with the U.S. being in such a tense situation with Iran while in Iraq is that a situation may arise where we SHOULD go to war with Iran. At least that is how it will be presented to us when American soldiers end up dead by Iranian hands. I don't know if I'll be able to disagree with them. And it will be a damned shame too, because the populous of Iran is surprisingly pro-American. Most young Iranians crave better relations with the west, and don't like the old, islamist leaders of their nation who keep their country from advancing economically and technologically through their constant saber rattling. Of course, the quickest way we could possibly galvanize support for the failing leadership in Iran would be to go to war with them.
Ok, break for today, tomorrow I'll post U.S. vs Turkey, then on sunday U.S. vs Russia, and finally on Monday the conclusion.
Thursday, October 18, 2007
Just wait...
Man, do I have a post for tomorrow. I'll lay out the most important reasons that the US should leave Iraq, and let you know who the candidates are who might actually understand that. Fun stuff!
For now, an update on my own life:
I've been working for DiningIn.com since Monday now, and while it's helping me pay the bills, the main benefit of the job is that it's motivated me quite a lot to take a big step in my life. Right now that's looking like vet school, but a career with a zoo is also on the table. I've been kind of shying away from jobs that would require a long-term commitment, and talked about possibly going back to graduate school, but working this dog-shit job has helped me focus on what I really want. I want to get back to working with animals, and I want a career I can be proud of. If you can't get up in the morning, look at yourself in the mirror and be proud of who you see, then something needs to change. All these revelations after just 3 and a half days! I should have done this years ago. Check back next week when I'll probably have changed my mind yet again :)
For now, an update on my own life:
I've been working for DiningIn.com since Monday now, and while it's helping me pay the bills, the main benefit of the job is that it's motivated me quite a lot to take a big step in my life. Right now that's looking like vet school, but a career with a zoo is also on the table. I've been kind of shying away from jobs that would require a long-term commitment, and talked about possibly going back to graduate school, but working this dog-shit job has helped me focus on what I really want. I want to get back to working with animals, and I want a career I can be proud of. If you can't get up in the morning, look at yourself in the mirror and be proud of who you see, then something needs to change. All these revelations after just 3 and a half days! I should have done this years ago. Check back next week when I'll probably have changed my mind yet again :)
Wednesday, October 10, 2007
Bland and tasteless
How to blog, lesson #1: First, recall a personal anecdote of little to no actual importance, and then extrapolate on it to make a sweeping and simplistic generalization about the state of society.
So I had it in my head that I would go and buy Trivial Pursuit recently. I had just found out that all four of my roommates had been in quiz bowl together in high school, and there was a gauntlet that definitely needed to be thrown down. Plus I was sick of losing to Bill at chess, so any new board game would be a welcome relief. Now there's not a whole lot of places in this area I could think to go to for that kinda thing, but I figured Target was a decent starting place. Of course the problem with Target is that since they carry EVERYTHING, they don't carry a very wide selection of any particular item category. Apparently "Totally 80's!" trivial pursuit is the only one that sells well anymore because it was the only one they stocked. No worries, I figured, I'll just head to my back-up, Wal-Mart. Normally I wouldn't touch a Wal-Mart with a 10 foot fucking pole, but I really wanted that game and I've never been a man to stand too strongly on principle. Problem was, Wal-Mart had the EXACT same game selection as Target. I know this probably doesn't surprise many people, but I try to avoid big box stores whenever possible so it wasn't something I was prepared for. I decided it was time for my ace-in-the-hole, I would go to Toys-R-Us.(I wish I knew how to make the "R" backwards, it doesn't look right without it.) Of course I didn't go straight there. As I was driving there I saw a K-Mart and figured it was worth a shot. Man, I haven't been in one of those in years, and it'll be years before I make that mistake again. It was like visiting a sickly old man on his death bed. Sure you feel bad for him, but at the same time you're not about to touch him. I'm pretty sure even if they had the game I wouldn't have wanted to buy it, but as they had astoundingly less of a selection than the other stores I wasn't forced to make that choice. So on to Toys-R-Us (seriously, that just doesn't look right) and, I was sure, to a decent trivial pursuit game. It seems though that it just wasn't meant to be. Sure they had the trivial pursuit "Totally 80's!" edition, they even had the kid's version and something called the booklovers edition (which was full of the most obscure literature questions i've ever seen, seriously i couldn't come close to answering a single question), but they didn't have the normal fucking version. It seems if you want to play trivial pursuit you now have to choose between a version a five-year old can play, a version that no one could possibly play without a PhD in modern American literature, or a version that NO ONE FUCKING CARES ABOUT. Of course I must be wrong about that last bit, otherwise why would every damn store have stocked "Totally 80'!" trivial pursuit? Seriously, if you own "Totally 80's!" trivial pursuit, I hate you. One last bit before I finally get to the point. The other stores had also stocked this jeopardy game I looked at a bit. It seemed like a reasonable replacement, it even had electronic buzzers you could use and it plugged into the tv to read you the questions. Only thing was it was a bit pricey. At that point though I was frustrated enough to front the extra money for electronic jeopardy. The problem was when I looked at it again, the game was multiple choice. What the fuck is the point of multiple choice jeopardy? It might be a stupider fucking idea than "Totally 80's!" trivial pursuit. If real jeopardy was like that it would be...well I guess it would be Who Wants to be a Millionaire, but cheaper. Hell maybe it would work.
Ok, so that story went on a bit longer than I figured it would, but it brings me to my point. Big box stores suck. Specifically they operate under economic conditions that make it profitable only to stock the most highly purchased items in any one category so that they'll have room to stuff everything you could conceivably need to buy into one store. In the end you're often left with little to no choice when it comes to buying something. I guarantee that there are still some toy stores out there that I could have gone to, but thanks to having to compete with the larger stores, there are so many less than there were even fifteen years ago when I was a kid. It's the same for other goods too, when a national chain replaces all the smaller specialized stores, you're left with only what that chain chooses to provide. Putting aside a rant on how that leaves these stores with unfair amounts of power over manufacturers, you're still left with the fact that the selection just plain sucks.
Ok, maybe that's not a very original point, but I've got another unoriginal one, so bear with me. While desperately searching for a normal trivial pursuit game, I was struck too by the fact that there were no suitable replacements available to buy either. The trivia games were all simplistic and easy or about disney or pop culture. The "brain games" all involved making clay sculptures and singing. Other than the obligatory chess board, there were no games that weren't, for lack of a better word, dumb. And these games aren't here by chance, they're the games that sell the best. People love the dumb games, and anything intellectually challenging just can't compete with "Totally 80's!" trivial pursuit for shelf space. Now look at me, snobbish and superior because I want to play trivial pursuit, truly the past time of great minds. Still that's partly the point, 9 times out of 10 I prefer the dumb games too. I'm not trying to say it's a sign of the times, but I am saying that people in our country are pretty fucking dumb. We do much prefer Who Wants to be a Millionaire to Jeopardy. I'm not going for a Mike Wallace moment here, I don't think it's a condemnation of modern society that more people don't want to play more trivial pursuit, but at the same time it's a bit disappointing, and a bit depressing.
Anyways, to wrap the story up, I was able to find a new version of trivial pursuit online, and despite the steep price tag (70$ for a board game?!) I ordered it and once Vijay hits the rare lull between cramming for med school exams, the gauntlet can be properly thrown. Of course that didn't stop Bill from finding an older copy of trivial pursuit in his room and promptly beating me and robbie at it. I fucking hate that guy.
So I had it in my head that I would go and buy Trivial Pursuit recently. I had just found out that all four of my roommates had been in quiz bowl together in high school, and there was a gauntlet that definitely needed to be thrown down. Plus I was sick of losing to Bill at chess, so any new board game would be a welcome relief. Now there's not a whole lot of places in this area I could think to go to for that kinda thing, but I figured Target was a decent starting place. Of course the problem with Target is that since they carry EVERYTHING, they don't carry a very wide selection of any particular item category. Apparently "Totally 80's!" trivial pursuit is the only one that sells well anymore because it was the only one they stocked. No worries, I figured, I'll just head to my back-up, Wal-Mart. Normally I wouldn't touch a Wal-Mart with a 10 foot fucking pole, but I really wanted that game and I've never been a man to stand too strongly on principle. Problem was, Wal-Mart had the EXACT same game selection as Target. I know this probably doesn't surprise many people, but I try to avoid big box stores whenever possible so it wasn't something I was prepared for. I decided it was time for my ace-in-the-hole, I would go to Toys-R-Us.(I wish I knew how to make the "R" backwards, it doesn't look right without it.) Of course I didn't go straight there. As I was driving there I saw a K-Mart and figured it was worth a shot. Man, I haven't been in one of those in years, and it'll be years before I make that mistake again. It was like visiting a sickly old man on his death bed. Sure you feel bad for him, but at the same time you're not about to touch him. I'm pretty sure even if they had the game I wouldn't have wanted to buy it, but as they had astoundingly less of a selection than the other stores I wasn't forced to make that choice. So on to Toys-R-Us (seriously, that just doesn't look right) and, I was sure, to a decent trivial pursuit game. It seems though that it just wasn't meant to be. Sure they had the trivial pursuit "Totally 80's!" edition, they even had the kid's version and something called the booklovers edition (which was full of the most obscure literature questions i've ever seen, seriously i couldn't come close to answering a single question), but they didn't have the normal fucking version. It seems if you want to play trivial pursuit you now have to choose between a version a five-year old can play, a version that no one could possibly play without a PhD in modern American literature, or a version that NO ONE FUCKING CARES ABOUT. Of course I must be wrong about that last bit, otherwise why would every damn store have stocked "Totally 80'!" trivial pursuit? Seriously, if you own "Totally 80's!" trivial pursuit, I hate you. One last bit before I finally get to the point. The other stores had also stocked this jeopardy game I looked at a bit. It seemed like a reasonable replacement, it even had electronic buzzers you could use and it plugged into the tv to read you the questions. Only thing was it was a bit pricey. At that point though I was frustrated enough to front the extra money for electronic jeopardy. The problem was when I looked at it again, the game was multiple choice. What the fuck is the point of multiple choice jeopardy? It might be a stupider fucking idea than "Totally 80's!" trivial pursuit. If real jeopardy was like that it would be...well I guess it would be Who Wants to be a Millionaire, but cheaper. Hell maybe it would work.
Ok, so that story went on a bit longer than I figured it would, but it brings me to my point. Big box stores suck. Specifically they operate under economic conditions that make it profitable only to stock the most highly purchased items in any one category so that they'll have room to stuff everything you could conceivably need to buy into one store. In the end you're often left with little to no choice when it comes to buying something. I guarantee that there are still some toy stores out there that I could have gone to, but thanks to having to compete with the larger stores, there are so many less than there were even fifteen years ago when I was a kid. It's the same for other goods too, when a national chain replaces all the smaller specialized stores, you're left with only what that chain chooses to provide. Putting aside a rant on how that leaves these stores with unfair amounts of power over manufacturers, you're still left with the fact that the selection just plain sucks.
Ok, maybe that's not a very original point, but I've got another unoriginal one, so bear with me. While desperately searching for a normal trivial pursuit game, I was struck too by the fact that there were no suitable replacements available to buy either. The trivia games were all simplistic and easy or about disney or pop culture. The "brain games" all involved making clay sculptures and singing. Other than the obligatory chess board, there were no games that weren't, for lack of a better word, dumb. And these games aren't here by chance, they're the games that sell the best. People love the dumb games, and anything intellectually challenging just can't compete with "Totally 80's!" trivial pursuit for shelf space. Now look at me, snobbish and superior because I want to play trivial pursuit, truly the past time of great minds. Still that's partly the point, 9 times out of 10 I prefer the dumb games too. I'm not trying to say it's a sign of the times, but I am saying that people in our country are pretty fucking dumb. We do much prefer Who Wants to be a Millionaire to Jeopardy. I'm not going for a Mike Wallace moment here, I don't think it's a condemnation of modern society that more people don't want to play more trivial pursuit, but at the same time it's a bit disappointing, and a bit depressing.
Anyways, to wrap the story up, I was able to find a new version of trivial pursuit online, and despite the steep price tag (70$ for a board game?!) I ordered it and once Vijay hits the rare lull between cramming for med school exams, the gauntlet can be properly thrown. Of course that didn't stop Bill from finding an older copy of trivial pursuit in his room and promptly beating me and robbie at it. I fucking hate that guy.
Thursday, October 4, 2007
A Melodramatic Mea Culpa
First the positive stuff. Overall I enjoyed the season immensely. We really had a great group of guys, and it was a ton of fun playing and hanging out with everybody. A season like this is what makes me want to come back to this sport every year. We had stretches where we played really well too. CHC was about as much as I'll ever ask from a tournament, and even though the results weren't always there I always enjoyed hanging out with the team. It was great working with Tim and Jacob as captains too. They really cared a lot about the team and were willing to do whatever they could to make us better. I wish I had their work ethic. It was very exciting playing with the younger guys too. There were kids on the team that are going to be great ultimate players very soon, and I genuinely hope that we helped make them better this year, I only regret occasions where our goals as a team didn't favor their growth as players. Hopefully they all know how much we value their contributions. And the truth is I value immensely the contribution of everybody who played this season, I hope to see all you guys out next year.
Still the season ends bitterly. For the second time in six years I won't be at regionals, and this marks three years in a row I haven't qualified. I didn't care when I was with HogButcher, but the last two years the guys on our team really deserved to go. If regionals weren't in Tulsa I'm sure we would be there again filling in for whatever team bailed out, but it wouldn't change the fact that we couldn't make it there on our own. The last two years were easier to take not because I wasn't upset about not qualifying, but because there was no special guilt that accompanied it. This year as a captain, I can't help feel like I let the team down. There was too much talent and drive on our team not to have put forth a better showing, and I wish I could have been able to turn that into a better result. Additionally, I never felt like I contributed enough on the field this year. I can't remember a season when I've been less satisfied with my individual contribution to the team. And it's not just because I sat out most of Sunday at regionals with a shoulder injury, or that I almost choked to death during the game-to-to. (That's not a metaphor, I actually collapsed violently choking on a clump of grass during a point, it'll be funny in hindsight I'm sure.) It just wasn't there this year. I could have conditioned more, I could have thrown more, I damn sure could have put more time in as a captain. Still I think the biggest problem was I didn't want it enough. Sounds cliche sure, but when crunch time came I doubted whether the disc belonged in my hands. You can't have those thoughts in your head as a player, and you definitely can't as a leader. Plenty of stuff to think about in the off season I guess. Plenty of time to take a good hard look at why I play this game and what I want to get out of it. Hopefully the guilt I feel about letting my team mates down will get my ass out the door in the winter cold to stay in shape in the off season to better prepare for next year. We shall see.
Still the season ends bitterly. For the second time in six years I won't be at regionals, and this marks three years in a row I haven't qualified. I didn't care when I was with HogButcher, but the last two years the guys on our team really deserved to go. If regionals weren't in Tulsa I'm sure we would be there again filling in for whatever team bailed out, but it wouldn't change the fact that we couldn't make it there on our own. The last two years were easier to take not because I wasn't upset about not qualifying, but because there was no special guilt that accompanied it. This year as a captain, I can't help feel like I let the team down. There was too much talent and drive on our team not to have put forth a better showing, and I wish I could have been able to turn that into a better result. Additionally, I never felt like I contributed enough on the field this year. I can't remember a season when I've been less satisfied with my individual contribution to the team. And it's not just because I sat out most of Sunday at regionals with a shoulder injury, or that I almost choked to death during the game-to-to. (That's not a metaphor, I actually collapsed violently choking on a clump of grass during a point, it'll be funny in hindsight I'm sure.) It just wasn't there this year. I could have conditioned more, I could have thrown more, I damn sure could have put more time in as a captain. Still I think the biggest problem was I didn't want it enough. Sounds cliche sure, but when crunch time came I doubted whether the disc belonged in my hands. You can't have those thoughts in your head as a player, and you definitely can't as a leader. Plenty of stuff to think about in the off season I guess. Plenty of time to take a good hard look at why I play this game and what I want to get out of it. Hopefully the guilt I feel about letting my team mates down will get my ass out the door in the winter cold to stay in shape in the off season to better prepare for next year. We shall see.
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